It’s Thursday and RJ leaves today…
I don’t know if I can do this.
He’s going 1,300 miles away from me and I’ve been falling asleep in his arms every night for 3 weeks now and I’m so used to being warm and close to him, I don’t know if I can sleep without him. And when I get up in the morning I won’t be able to wake him up with kisses, and I’ll be alone. I know I’m strong. But my heart already aches for him. I’m planning on going to see him in October. Then hopefully he’ll be home for thanksgiving and Christmas. But I have a year before I can move with him. And a year is a long time, a lot of things can happen in a year… I just want to marry him tomorrow and go with him. But I have plans and he has plans and we have to find a way to stay connected through all of this.
Let the mental breakdowns begin… Only 3 days left with my love. :(
I feel like you are going to leave and I’m just going to be here, feeling empty. Nobody here understands me or how hard it is for me to be okay when I’m alone. You are going to leave and meet up with all of your friends and have a great time and I’m just going to be here sad wishing I was with you. I feel complete when I’m with you. I resent the fact that I have to finish school before I can leave. A year is a long time to be away from the person you love. And realizing that I really don’t have any friends just makes this even harder…
I only have friends because they are actually just your friends… If it weren’t for you nobody would like me anyway.
I love when you come over and sleep in my bed. I’m staying up late packing my room and you are asleep lightly snoring right now. You are the closest thing to perfect I’ve ever experienced. You bring me food so I don’t have to get out of bed. You come over just to cuddle me and you don’t mind taking naps all of the time. You make me feel beautiful no matter what I’m wearing or when the last time I showered was. You carry heavy things for me. You get along with my mom and dad. You seriously make me the happiest I’ve ever been. I don’t want you to leave, but I know I have to. And as I sit here writing this, I know that I will do everything in my power to be with you, just as you will to be with me. I love you. 1,350 miles means nothing.